Every horse show weekend is a learning experience in and of itself, but that was especially true for Texas Rose…
1. Always watch ALL of the helmet cam footage, don’t just delete the excess.
I’m not coordinated enough to be able to properly push the button to start the GoPro while I’m mounted, so I always turn it on when I put my helmet on and turn it off when I take my helmet off. This makes for a really long video file, which I just cut down to the ride itself and trash the rest of the footage. This time I accidentally left the raw video rolling in the background on my computer while I did something else and happened to hear my post-ride conversation with Bobby. It was too great to omit, so I made it into it’s own video. If you like cussing, burping, high fives, or Bobby – it’s pretty hilarious.
2. Saddle pad = stall door.
Henry is a bit of a dumb, and every time I closed his stall door he would start spinning and neighing in his stall. Solid walls with no windows… he was pretty sure that by shutting the stall door I was also removing all his friends. I tried tying his lead rope across the doorway and leaving his door open, but he kept putting his head under to escape. Then I hung a saddle pad over the lead rope and he was like “Aw man, now there’s a DOOR there, I can’t get out!”. Yes Henry, you’re totally right – that saddle pad is absolutely a solid door. Bless your heart. Worked like a charm though, I could leave him like that for hours and not only was he perfectly content, he stayed put.
3. Hot pink underwear, while beautiful, are not wise.
I have this one pair of underwear that are so perfect for dressage. No seams, very soft fabric, the perfect size and shape. For real, they’re the holy grail of underwear. None of my others compare. Sadly, they’re also hot pink and I’ve never been able to find the exact same pair in white or beige. I skirted this problem by wearing an underlayer, thinking I was pretty smart. Then I sweated buckets during dressage at Texas Rose, my underwear bled through my underlayer and my perfect white breeches, and it looked like I had my bubble gum period. Luckily I was so hot I couldn’t muster up the energy to give a shit, but you’re welcome fellow Area 5 eventers for the entertainment.
4. Yelling “CHAMPIONS” at people is totally acceptable.
When you have a 4 hour haul to get home and are totally delirious from heat stroke and lack of sleep, it is perfectly ok to entertain yourselves by honking at strangers and yelling “CHAMPIONS!!!”. It works even better if you hold your ribbons up to the window and wave while you do it. People love that. It’s basically a parade.
5. There are idiots everywhere you go
If I saw one more person sitting on their horse immediately after XC, standing in the sun and chatting for a while, and then having the horse carry them all the way back to the barn, I was gonna throat punch someone. It’s HOT, the horses are HOT and TIRED, get your ass off your horse, loosen your girth, and get them walking in the shade. Come on people. It’s an animal, not a golf cart.
6. There are awesome people everywhere you go, too
Eventers are a pretty cool lot. Between the finish line and the barn I had 5 complete strangers ask me how it went and congratulate me, one of whom was an Olympian. You just don’t get that anywhere else. I have never in my life walked back from a jumper class and had a complete stranger ask me, with a smile, how my round went. It’s impossible to go to an event and come back without at least one new friend. Stay cool, eventing… you’re the greatest.