Henry’s Grand Conspiracy

This horse, y’all. He is in So. Much. Trouble.

TURDBRED

First of all, I swear he smiled awfully damn smugly when Hurricane Harvey turned toward Houston. It cancelled our grand plan of Henry going down and spending a week with Trainer while I was in Europe… something that would have been really helpful for everyone. But no, instead he spent several days before I left, and the entire time I was gone, standing in his stall getting fatter. Two weeks off total. Well played, Henry. I don’t know how you conjured a hurricane, but it sure did have your signature.

Then I got home from Europe, hacked him once, and showed up the next day to find his big ol’ “I ATE A BEE” elephantitis head. Again, he seemed awfully damn smug as I put all my tack away and wrote a check to the vet instead. Three more days off.

YOU’RE WELCOME FOR THE AWESOME NEW HEATED MASSAGER

On Monday the swelling was finally pretty much gone, so I tossed all my jump tack on and went out in the field. A 20 minute hack went off without a hitch, so I popped him over a few little jumps. A grand total of 5 fences in and he tripped and came up missing a shoe. And of course, farrier couldn’t make it out until sometime today, and let me tell you who cannot be ridden without a shoe because omg his footie. Two more days off.

I can’t even make this shit up. WTF horse.

img_1306
He doesn’t even have the decency to pretend he’s sorry

This would be much less annoying if we didn’t have a show this weekend. Our first recognized in over a year, and our first recognized Training. Henry appears to be doing his best to get to the show without having been properly ridden in 3 weeks. The good news is that I’ve given up in advance on actually doing well, and now the focus has shifted to just finishing in one piece. Nice dressage? HA. Clear stadium? LOL. Let’s just focus on not dying, how bout that?

MCPriderimesSep17
so everyone knows what times to start praying

 

Trainer is bringing a rosary and some holy water, so maybe it’ll be fine?

22 thoughts on “Henry’s Grand Conspiracy

  1. Oh, Henry!
    Would you feel less stressed if you dropped back to Novice for this one and moved up at the next? (Henny can’t jump the fun jumps if he doesn’t let you practice…)
    Best of luck to you both!
    Betsy in WI

    Like

  2. He’s just got his panties in a twist because you were out oogling other handsome fellas. Just whisper some sweet nothings in his ear and all will (should) be well!

    Like

    1. Meh, not at Training. Pretty sure he could sit in a stall for 6 months and still be fine running training. He always LOOKS fat but I swear he’s a thoroughbred under there! ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s